March 11th: Timothy got stuck in traffic this morning because a truck carrying Swiss army knives jack-knifed, cork-screwed, filed, teeny scissored...
March 11th: Timothy got stuck in traffic this morning because a truck carrying Swiss army knives jack-knifed, cork-screwed, filed, teeny scissored...
March 10th: Timothy reminisces about some odd shows, Bouncers Banquet: No 1 was able to get in, Vaudevillian Stagehand Union: Got 42 hooks, Numerologists: Gave me a standing zero
March 9th: Timothy has some sports safety ideas… why don't pole vaulter's use parachutes? How about Sumo Airbags? What about ejector saddles for rodeos?
March 6th: Timothy thinks we should give a Nobel Consolation Prize to the cook who discovered toast, the architect of the lemon wedge & the farmer who harvested the 1st cottonball.
March 5th: Timothy is thinking, u have your close-up magic, what about close-up fire-eating? Close-up Clowns? [Tiny Pie tarts] Close-up Bowling Ball Juggling? Close-up toothpaste.
March 4th: Timothy thinks Vienna Cocktail Wieners are funny. Does the Vienna County Fair sell teeny corn dogs? Is their wienermobile a smart car? "Get your inch long here!"
March 3rd: Timothy's done dating vampires. They get nauseas if their eggs are sunnyside up, they leave bite marks on my plasma TV & they break up bcuz I'm not their type-O.
March 2nd: Timothy thinks other professions should advertise like variety acts: "World's Quietest Gardener!" "World's Fastest Contractor!" "World's Shyest Dentist!"
Feb. 27th: Timothy muses how many tries it took b4 they settled on the Teddy Bear… Did they try Teddy Weasels? Teddy Wildebeests? Teddy Shrews? Teddy Badgers? Teddy Guppies?
Feb. 26th: Timothy called tech support & asked how to change the font in his alphabet soup. I also congratulated them on Slum Dog Millionaire. Being a speed reader I use a Ladel.