Dec. 7th 2011: Batman in China: Clack! Bram! Crobber! Srap! Clunch! Licochet! Crang! Tlip!
Dec. 7th 2011: Made my signature dish last night… Alphabet Soup… cursive. I bought a piñata that was so ugly… you had to hit it w a 10 ft pole. Hey did you hear? The Relax The Back Store is now offering free Monkey Removal
Dec. 6th 2011: Forget about Buffalo wings… what about Pegasus wings? Now thems a meal!!! Is it safe to watch the Yule log on my kindle?
Dec. 5th 2011: Saw those singing Jingle bell dogs in concert Sunday… a passing Firetruck threw their arrangements into a gospel tizzy. Trying to carve a bust of my head in Fruitcake… so far 3 broken chisels. Due to economics, I can only buy 1 piper drumming while dancing with a leaping turtle.
Dec. 1st 2011: OK Victorville Zoo… FYI, I was not fooled by your penguin habitat filled with Chickens wearing tuxedos. Say, how many here used to ride the short yellow bus to school, clap your foreheads?
Dec. 1st 2011: Why can’t my GPS find Funky Town? Hey, there’s a new Holiday Pepper spray out… “Ahhh! I’ve been nutmegged!” I saw a Prius doing 75?! Immediately I thought, Stolen? PS: Leave a comment & Earn Timothy Reward Points
Nov. 30th 2011: Trying to hire a clown & make the Victoria Secrets show family friendly didn’t work… I just don’t think Nicki Minaj is funny. I got 32 ‘likes’ from my Niece… “Cuz like, I like, y’know, like…” Almond milk? Where are the hillsides covered with grazing dairy almonds?
Nov. 30th 2011: I ordered furniture on Cyber Monday & Target sent me a bean bag chair... uh hello... i ordered beef!
Nov. 29th 2011: No! What if I don’t want to let it snow? Help help… I can’t stop prancing… someone please turn off Leroy Anderson’s Sleigh ride!” Oh oh... Xmas will be late this year… Santa’s driving a Prius!
Nov. 18th 2011: I'd like to give a shout out to mimes... " ". I kid you not, I got flipped off by a driver & then... by his student driver. I saw a man peddling kayaks… “Hey why don’t you use oars?”