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30 Jan, 2012

Dec. 19th 2011: HRETLSO GZOB IPRTL FUUMPA? How do you turn off the caps lock on the alphabet soup can? Carpenters now use nail guns as time savers… why don’t judges use mallet guns? Here’s something that goes without saying...

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30 Jan, 2012

Dec. 15th 2011: GPS? Mine is actually a Goal Positioning Device... “You have arrived at your destination… Food Court Jester.” Did i say something rude last night b/c this morning I woke up with a Black eye tooth. This Re-gifting has gone on too long… neat Viewmaster tho... & the Rifleman lunch pale will come in handy too!

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30 Jan, 2012

Dec. 14th 2011: Saw an ad, ‘Learn to Stilt Walk in 10 Easy Giant steps.' In the event of a bear attack, don’t look tasty… pose at coleslaw. Did you know, at 1 time, Mr. PotatoHead worked in the circus as an assistant to a fork throwing act?

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30 Jan, 2012

Dec. 13th 2011: Odd, I asked my magic 8-ball if it was going to rain, it came back with “The 9 of Diamonds”. Is it me or does every 12 yr old wannabe pop star sound like a Bag Piper tuning up? Attractive? I'm more of what you would call ‘Photoshop’ Handsome.

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30 Jan, 2012

Dec. 12th 2011: Now new & improved... E=MC3

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30 Jan, 2012

Dec. 12th 2011: My life is no longer in a rut... Thanks transition lenses

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30 Jan, 2012

Dec. 12th 2011: ?3 Easy Steps to achieved the power of invisibility… 1. Sit next to a poodle riding a Dune Buggy; 2. 2 pole-dancers using 1 pole, [Neither Bipolar] & 3. a 6 ft. man in a Zebra Kimono. Funny moment at my AGT audition, “Danny the mime? Are you here? Danny the mime... Daaaaany?! Speak up…”

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30 Jan, 2012

Dec. 9th 2011: Monday I OD’ed on Flintstone vitamins & tried to run the car to the store. It’s time to diet again, people are taking my pix in landscape mode.

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30 Jan, 2012

Dec. 8th 2011: Shouldn’t the lid for my ‘Low Iron’ pills be easier to open? I know procuring a stilt walker for a tree lighting ceremony is a "tall order" Just get it done. Tee Hee... Last night I watched the Irony Chef while eating a TV dinner.

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30 Jan, 2012

Dec. 8th 2011: Columbus was actually Unipolar before 1492

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