A poem written several years ago.

Why we carry guns in Texas

It's been a particularly hot year in Texas Haven't seen one like this for a while They say it's Global Warming When I hear that I have to smile 'Cause the real reason seems to elude most They missed it by a country mile

See, heat has a tendency to rise And the crust is just thinner here In the cracks of the earth you'll hear voices If you choose to drop an ear The fences in hell need some mending Especially this time of year

Oh, so far only a few have escaped To wander this tortured earth But wait and see what the future holds What kind of terrors this old soil will birth 'Cause you're in Texas now and we carry guns Walk with a swagger and curse

Real men and real women live here Mostly indoors, of course And some drive Cadillacs and Lincolns 'Cause they had to give up their horse We're really not so bad here in Texas Satan just took us by force

Winter here comes later and later And sometimes it's just a cool breeze And the mosquitoes grow to vampire size And dogs are afraid of their fleas 'Cause it takes a good icing to kill 'em And Hell doesn't often freeze

Some day I guess we'll be taken Just an addition to that evil place And the demons they will come crawlin' And Satan will set up a base But for now we'll just have to wait And continue this hellish race

For now we'll just have to be patient Wiping the sweat from our feverish brows Watching as the heat takes our grasslands Our horses and our cows For now we'll sit here with iced tea and beer In the comfort of an air conditioned house

And let others make predictions And think they know the score We carry guns in Texas And by God, we know what they're for Just waiting for them demons To come knocking at our doors

Just waiting for them demons To come a knockin' at our doors

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